Reach out – you do not need to be an expert to support someone experiencing abuse.
Being a trusted person that a family member or friend can talk to, a person that makes someone feel supported, believed and encouraged, can help them to feel stronger and more able to make decisions and get professional help.
Follow our advice on what you can do and remember we are here to support them, and you.
Remember
It takes a lot of strength to talk about experiencing abuse, especially when many women & men are disbelieved or dismissed when they share their experience.
When someone reaches out to you, acknowledge that, although they are in a frightening and difficult situation, they are taking an important and brave step forward in reaching out to you.
For friends and family, it can be really challenging supporting someone who is experiencing domestic abuse but the most important thing you can do for them is to provide emotional support. Listen to them and believe them. Let them express their feelings to you and give them time and space to come to terms with the abuse.
Try to keep in mind that domestic abuse is about one person trying to control another – the perpetrator will likely have taken away a lot of the control from them, so try not to do the same. Instead of taking the situation out of their hands or making decisions for them, let them know that there is support available for them if and when they choose to reach out.
They may decide that it is not the right time to get support or leave. This is okay, it’s important not to force this or judge them for making this decision. Let them set their own boundaries of what they feel is and isn’t safe and always remember that they are the expert in their own experiences. However, if you have reason to believe that someone is in immediate danger, then you can call the police, or encourage them to call the police if they are able to do so.
When someone is sharing their experiences, really listen to them try to understand and don’t blame them. Let them know that they are not alone, and direct them to support services, like ours. The support workers can help them come to terms with the abuse and talk them through options.
When we are contacted, we promise we will never judge, we will always have a fully trained support worker available, we will give space to explore options and support the person to make choices and ensure they are aware of our confidentiality and safeguarding responsibilities. We are here for anyone that needs us.
Reach out for support
If you have been affected by any of these forms of violence and abuse, you can get in touch with us or our colleagues at the Live Fear Free helpline
Call us
Our support staff can offer advice via 01970 625 585 during office hours Mon-Fri 9.30am to 4.45pm. Outside of office hours our phone number can be used to access urgent information and advice.